Nirvana II

Questions of Gravity

What will life be like once I'm there?

Think about it this way: if you want it to be, life in N2 can be exactly like life in the world you've lived in all your life. You can awaken each morning and greet the day. You can pack a lunch and go to work if that's what you need to feel that life is worth something. On the other hand, there are possibilities to life here that go beyond description. Below are just a few of literally thousands of testimonials from some of our satisfied clients.

Derek W. - former high school basketball coach

"When I made the choice to 'step over the line' I was on the verge of being booted from my position at Englewood High for bein' too damn good! - 'Stop giving the players steroids,' they said! 'Stop yelling at my child,' they said. All they didn't say was, stop winning. What the hell? Right? Well screw them,' I said, 'I don't need this and I don't need you!' Right now what's left of my body is in the Dallas Vault. Most of it is gone, and good riddance to it! I coach a team here of pituitary cases that you wouldn't believe. They don't give me any lip, and I don't need to listen to any bullshit from their parents. I love this place."

Tybalt - former cat

"I having blast. No more listen to boss. Plenty fish. I ten year old boy and walk on two legs. Happy."

Woody A. - former funny man

“I uh, um uh I didn't want to come here. I, Was sitting home working on a new umm, uh, thing, and, and I realized we were out of milk. So you know, I ran downstairs without my glasses and accidentally wandered into the Manhattan Vault thinking it was deli. Before I knew what was happening I, I had signed up for the program. I honestly thought I was signing my credit card receipt. I gotta tell the truth though, I kinda like it here. I now got muscles like Schwarzenegger. I heard through the grapevine that they wanted to use my body parts to rebuild a ninety-five year old Republican dying from the bends, but it turned out that he refused to have anything installed that had ever been associated with me and, and, well no one else wanted them, so I could come back…I could. By the way, did I mention the women here?”

Derek Z. - former cement contractor

"I resent da implication dat I had anyting to do with any kinda election fraud or like dat. I hereby state for da record dat I am here o' my own accord an got nothin' ta do wit da government. Rumors to da effeckt dat Big Dennis has a contract out on my brain are ridoolous - also, I should warn anybody who has ideas - I got friends on de outside, if you know wha 'd I mean. Dis is a damn good place after all, wine, women and song all da live long day. I tink I mighta died and gone ta heaven."

Julie C. - former Cheer Leader

Gee I dunno. Back in the real world men were all about my body you know? I really hated that. Now that I'm here I've taken on the form of a small furry animal, and guys leave me alone. I guess that's a good thing. I guess its okay - but, you know, some days I kinda miss the old implants. But hey, that's the good thing around here - if I want to look like my old self or even better (like that's possiple - not!) and have jugs the size of basketballs, I can do it any time I want. And get this - they'll be perky as pups.